Just saw actual graffiti tags for a tumblr crew.

This food cart is named after the mission his friend died in and that’s Portland as hell.

“I got a pin that says ‘no gods, no masters, no tampons’!”

- on the Diva Cup, @ The Alleyway

rikerist:

a recording of the noises made by al jourgensen as he is forced to watch a kid listen to the decemberists on headphones while shopping for cantaloupes at whole foods using a ministry tote bag would be a better ministry album than any of the last fourteen (really, i counted) ministry albums

I ever tell you about the time I saw a guy at New Seasons with a Whole Foods tote and a Resistance Records t-shirt?

Been trying to buy a solid motorcycle and/or pickup truck (Toyota circa 22R/22RE, 4x4 manual, long bed, bench seat, not bobbed or dropped or lifted) off Craigslist for a while now, which has involved a bunch of trips to the redneckier outskirts of Portland.

“Pitiful Princess Gentlemen’s Club”

That’s quite a name.

Experience our turn of the (last) century speakeasy-cannabis dispensary. A throwback to a simpler, yet decadent time, but with modern strains, hemp-based elixirs, medibles, and technologically-advanced retail service. Our goal is to offer the discerning consumer the best product in a pleasing retail environment.  Come in and enjoy the sounds of hot jazz while our knowledgeable budtenders fulfill your needs. Remember, hush-hush, and speakeasy.  At Brooklyn Holding Company we are always “holding”

Portland.

Went to an open house off Division today, because of course I did, because I am the cancer destroying Portland. Would be a nice place if only every single wall was somewhere else.

Hahaha, real estate!

mapsontheweb:

Portland portrait as a GTA V map.

via reddit

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…yeah, okay.

pictured: craigslist

I’ve actually been hearing about a *lot* of property crimes, and even street robberies lately in Portland.

kontextmaschine:

Consultants without their own offices sometimes use this teahouse to meet with clients, I remember in one week I once overheard sessions on the following:

• Preparing to apply to college
• Dealing with jealousy in polyamorous relationships
• Planning a woodcrafts-themed wedding
• Aligning your chakras to unlock career potential
• Setting up a mung bean breakfast bar business for the vegan paleo diet market

I’m back and there’s a pair of maybe 36 year old women at the next table and they’re telling stories about their mommyblogging - like, not sharing tales about their kids, sharing tales about sharing tales about their kids - and one of them is going off about how their son would always be crying at 4am and how that confirmed her in a long-ago argument that that was the true witching hour and she’s proud that he’s inherited her sensitivity to spirits.

Went to my first Timbers game. Good shit. Basically a Timbers Army event that put on a soccer game as a stage show.

So euro, we have terrace chants. So euro, we wave a regional-secessionist flag as a team symbol.

Never seen that many drunks in green outside of St. Patrick’s. Went with a Boston girl, musta been nostalgic.

Random street bro just gave me a high five for using “needn’t’ve” while talking to myself.

Like, The Big Bang Theory is a ridiculous caricature of nerds, and a far outdated one at that, right? That’s not how anyone is.

EXCEPT, every time I go down to The Standard lately, I run across this socially awkward really-hot-in-a-mousy-way girl with a braying laugh/chubby guy with an aspirated voice pair talking and making jokes about science and math and comic books. It’s fucking *unreal*.