Okay, bending at the waist starting to show the same stability and ease it did before Covid.

I am going to have a six-pack within as little as four months.

I have not seen my abdominal muscles in… perhaps ever.

Alright, my right Latissimus dorsi follows my pecs as first torso muscles distinguishable under the skin.

Awkward reminder that you can replicate this “muscle gain and masculine sensibility goes up -> you get randomly built out of nowhere” effect at home by taking anabolic steroids

Oh, well, all that pushing the (two-wheeled) garden barrow full of topsoil around has apparently worked out some lower back muscle I needed to redevelop, walking is at least 20% more effortless now.

I now have several torso muscles thick enough to massage (and need it to loosen up) like shoulders

I have opened up slashes on the pads of most of my right fingers by grabbing things wrong while my skin is suddenly tight in a way that might be related to how the testosterone is supercharging my muscle growth

So I guess my take-away from ::gestures:: all this is that after I graduated college I was not in fact a final-stage imago, I had to moult through several instars before, mediated by Covid, I pupated.

Saw for the first time in years a girl who I had indirectly made clear I’d be interested in but she’d indirectly made clear she wouldn’t, and she mentioned that I was looking good while she’s clearly not even in her early 30s anymore, so that was nice.

The progression of how my arms feel as the fat melts off has been spoiled by the complication that the muscles are also growing significantly larger and harder.

Okay got a new yard of topsoil and did some very minor distribution and leveling of yesterday’s, in looking for something strenuous to do that wouldn’t aggravate the stitch in my back I used the new mattock to take out maybe 20% of the remaining lower backyard bamboo.

That exhausted me, but in how well my core was holding up even exhausted AND favoring the back I’m appreciating how fucking strong it’s getting, curious what it’s gonna look like when the rest of the fat melts off over the next year. “Oh I’m suddenly getting thin for no reason” was already so dumb you could only just “sure~”, so “and I’m actually gonna be kinda ripped” is just more of the same.

Gotta plan some stuff for the fence to tell the contractor by tomorrow. I was gonna get one gate with over-height posts so that when I tile the roof in Japanese style of authenticity to be determined I could use some tiles and set up a small matching gate roof, but I’m realizing I have to make decisions about specific height and crossbar now. My mind’s still recovering in terms of how many factors I can account for how many steps ahead in a way that makes planning hard, so I’m gonna have to take some graph paper and draw things in a way that concretizes them tonight.

Okay, wow, maybe I should have stuck to just one yard of topsoil yesterday, ow

I have been working shirtless out in the side yard (the right of way with Strawberry Ridge and Blueberry Hill) most days for the last year and a half, I wonder if anyone passed by on the path enough to appreciate my physical come-up.

…I am gonna look very hot in a few months, huh?

Wanted to talk about the changing feel to the touch of my torso as the fat melts away but the dominant impression is really of how meaty my arms and chest are getting.

Okay, uh, accidentally went down a creatine scoop a day early cause I guess I had “it’s gonna be 4” in my head measuring it out and missed the “…after this one”, but that works, I went from only weakly noticing it when it was time for a new one to “yeah I feel it in my limbs but it’s not going to make getting up that hard”

I was going to go down months ago but that day I got another echo that pushed it back up over one scoop, and before I’d fully worked that off another one that did it maybe half a scoop.

Which means that if my back-of-envelope calculations are correct and no more delays, I’ve had 40% of the total weight loss from when I first went down to 5 scoops already, which: believeable!

The significance of finally passing through the level I had been mentally modeling myself as last month was that I no longer registering myself as line, getting thinner in terms of that body I’ve always had

From here on, especially with all the muscle gain lately, I’ve just never had this body in my life, it’s like a second puberty.

Huh, new degrees of thinness usually proceed forearms-upper arms-chest-upper stomach-lower stomach, but I just noticed one first in the chest.

But when I checked my arms I realize they’re no smaller in diameter but much firmer as the fat loss has been matched by testosterone-powered muscle gain.

This is just… dumb. This is, quite literally, adolescent fantasy fulfillment. I haven’t even had this fantasy in decades.

::sigh::

Okay I was trying on some of my old LA clothes to see what fit now and there was a long-sleeved shirt where the arms don’t

Like, I maybe could have worn it with the fabric that tight but it would’ve felt weird?

Honestly this gets tedious, like once was cute, twice was a trend, but this is just the same joke now. Probably gonna be for a while!