shrine to the prophet of americana

#blue bitch (13 posts)

Okay, I have the next two days of pitching planned and then I think I might actually rent a vibratory tamper to settle it all a...

kontextmaschine:

Okay, I have the next two days of pitching planned and then I think I might actually rent a vibratory tamper to settle it all a bit.

Like you can get those things home in a pickup truck, right?

When Blue Bitch broke down on the pass on the way to Missoula, the guy who saved me was a motorcycle rider who was hauling a fifth-wheel trailer to take his family to where they’d drawn an out-of-state elk tag in Idaho, he pulled over and was like “we’ll just put it in the back!” and I was like “but how?” and he was like “I’m a firefighter!” and just picked it up

Tagged: blue bitch

Buying products from the Facebook ads that have me pegged pretty well, noticing that "having ridden an old Universal Japanese...

Buying products from the Facebook ads that have me pegged pretty well, noticing that “having ridden an old Universal Japanese Motorcycle across old surface highways in the less-settled West” is one of the signifiers they’re appealing to that they think you’d want to identify with but — I’ve actually done that.

Tagged: this is an ad on facebook dot com blue bitch

pretty sure this is the Angeles Crest Highway north of LA, famous as a motorcycle route. I took Blue Bitch there once.

pretty sure this is the Angeles Crest Highway north of LA, famous as a motorcycle route. I took Blue Bitch there once.

Tagged: blue bitch

In retrospect kind of appreciate that my first motorcycle was old enough you kickstarted it. (It had a first-generation electric...

In retrospect kind of appreciate that my first motorcycle was old enough you kickstarted it. (It had a first-generation electric starter that was really only good for restarting a warm engine)

Tagged: blue bitch

Once in LA I totally skidded through a red light on Sunset at Alvarado cause the guy who first put Blue Bitch together was not...

Once in LA I totally skidded through a red light on Sunset at Alvarado cause the guy who first put Blue Bitch together was not as authoritatively competent as he signified (sold a lot of Black Bombers to names you’d recognize, though) and fucked up the rear drum brake

Tagged: blue bitch

So the time I got my first motorcycle i got it built from parts by Barron Gunter at Illuminati Cycles, which was a lot behind El...

So the time I got my first motorcycle i got it built from parts by Barron Gunter at Illuminati Cycles, which was a lot behind El Globo, the Mexican Mafia club at Sunset and Vendome

And part of the deal I was kind of his shop monkey for a while, scrubbing rust off pipes and learning things, and he had somehow become a millionaire during the original dot.com boom and been married to this woman and joined the Navy and had an antique store in Austin and been betrayed by that woman and lost that money and become a 12-stepper, I wasn’t really sure of the chronology there

And I came in 2 or 3 days a week and he only charged like $1400 for a CB350 with the ‘68 2-tone tank (and a scratched cylinder and electrical gremlins) but he was taking forever to put it together, I was coming in all summer while he did “Black Bomber” CB450s for rich Hollywood assholes and I put up with it until the day his credit line guy came by and while that guy was standing around I picked my moment to curse Barron out about how I gave him this money and he was just sitting on it not doing a goddamn thing and what the fuck that was an actual business deal not palling around

And next week that’s how I got Blue Bitch!

Tagged: kontextmaschine does hollywood this isn't an aesthetic journey this really happened blue bitch

For reference i had a Scion tC in LA and then it got stolen so I got a CB350 motorcycle

For reference i had a Scion tC in LA and then it got stolen so I got a CB350 motorcycle

Tagged: blue bitch

Blue Bitch was found in the back of a van towed, impounded, and finally sold at police auction.

Blue Bitch was found in the back of a van towed, impounded, and finally sold at police auction.

Tagged: blue bitch

Well, the other day someone knocked on my door and asked if I was selling Blue Bitch It's been in my driveway since I got it...

Well, the other day someone knocked on my door and asked if I was selling Blue Bitch

It’s been in my driveway since I got it from the garage when the 919 got stolen and got a new electrical harness installed but that didn’t kill the gremlins so it was a sculpture

And I was thinking finally yeah maybe I should call him up on the number he left, let someone else deal with it.

Well, until I went out for a late dinner at 1 and when I got back at 230 it was gone

I mean not like I didn’t know motorcycles could be stolen from that driveway

Tagged: blue bitch

So all through my teenage years I really wanted a Mitsubishi Eclipse. The 97-on, scalloped sides one. Then in 2006 when I was...

So all through my teenage years I really wanted a Mitsubishi Eclipse. The 97-on, scalloped sides one.

Then in 2006 when I was finally buying a car they restyled away from that into some dumb smooth teardrop-butt style. (I had been driving a hand-me-down Acura Integra, but they had luxuried up the new ones to match the US “Acura” badging, and the thing they replaced the old sporty/practical coupe slot with, the Civic GT-R, was in high demand so waiting lists and $3,000 markups.)

So I found a used one to take for a test drive (on the car-dealership strip on Brand Blvd. in Glendale. Did you know dealership strips like that exist cause towns in multi-jurisdiction economies offer beggar-thy-neighbor tax deals?)

And I realized the ergonomics were terrible, the sight lines were absolute shit, and the performance was underwhelming as hell.

That was before we somehow ran out of gas, I’m afraid the salesman thought he lost the deal that way, and not just cause the car was shit.

(I got a Scion tC, rode it hard for a few years before it got stolen, got paid out near new value and then LAPD found it in a cul-de-sac around Temple and the 101. The tow lot lady said everyone made the Lebowski jokes about the Creedence by then. I pocketed the insurance and had this ratbike mechanic named Barron in the back yard of a Mexican Mafia club rebuild me a 1968 Honda CB350.)

Tagged: kontextmaschine does hollywood blue bitch

did you ever get a new bike after yours got stolen

Anonymous asked: did you ever get a new bike after yours got stolen

I got my old CB350 that was ridden with electrical gremlins out of storage and I took it down to the good vintage motorcycle mechanic and had them rip out and rebuild the whole rat-wired harness and they gave it back to me to ride around and get a feel for how to rebuild the engine

and it ran so rough I literally drove through an earthquake and didn’t notice it and then I parked it in my driveway for an hour and the battery drained and it wouldn’t start even after I trickle charged it so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

but Uber offered a deal where for $5/mo I’d be forgiven of all my ride charges between $5 and $25 so they’ve captured/rescued me

Tagged: blue bitch

Inside The LC: The Strange but Mostly True Story of Laurel Canyon and the Birth of the Hippie Generation (Part 4)

facelessbitchmage:

‘As the website of the current Laurel Canyon Association notes, “restrictive covenants were attached to the new parcel deeds. These were thinly veiled attempts to limit ownership to white males of a certain class. While there are many references to the bigotry of the developers in our area, it would appear that some residents were also prone to bias and lawlessness. This article was published in a local paper in 1925:

Frank Sanceri, the man who was flogged by self-styled ‘white knights’ on Lookout Mountain in Hollywood several months ago, was found not guilty by a jury in Superior Judge Shea’s courtroom of having unlawfully attacked Astrea Jolley, aged 11. 

“Wealthier residents were also attracted to Laurel Canyon. With the creation of the Hollywood film industry in 1910, the canyon attracted a host of ‘photoplayers,’ including Wally Reid, Tom Mix, Clara Bow, Richard Dix, Norman Kerry, Ramon Navarro, Harry Houdini and Bessie Love.”

The author of this little slice of Laurel Canyon history would clearly like us to believe that the “wealthier residents” were a group quite separate from the violent hooligans roaming the canyon. The history of such groups in Los Angeles, however, clearly suggests otherwise. Paul Young, for example, has written in L.A. Exposed of Los Angeles’ early “vigilance committees, which stepped in to take care of outlaws on their own, often with the complete absolution of the mayor himself. Judge Lynch, for example, formed the Los Angeles Rangers in 1854 with some of the city’s top judges, lawyers, and businessmen including tycoon Phineas Banning of the Banning Railroad. And there was the Los Angeles Home Guard, another bloodthirsty paramilitary organization, made up of notable citizens, and the much-feared El Monte Rangers, a group of Texas wranglers that specialized in killing Mexicans. As one would expect, there was no regard for the victim’s rights in such kangaroo courts. Victims were often dragged from their homes, jail cells, even churches, and beaten, horse-whipped, tortured, mutilated, or castrated before being strung up on the nearest tree.” 

And that, dear readers, is how we do things out here on the ‘Left’ Coast.’

Had a college girlfriend who passed on that when her mom was a girl at a sleepover in the foothills at the Valley mouth of the canyon, in one of those hillside houses where the basement has a sliding glass door, Captain Beefheart and his band showed up drunk and uninvited and had to be shooed away.

Only Canyon story of my own is that when I was riding Blue Bitch up around there the timing chain snapped and I had to glide/push her down, not only was that the only time I’ve ever had motorcycle problems that someone else didn’t stop to offer help, but the other drivers on the road were downright obnoxious about me being in their way.

No overnight weekend parking in that part of Weho so I just pushed it east down the sidewalk on Hollywood. Stopped in a liquor store and got a flask, pushed it 200 steps on one side, took a drink, switched. By the time I was clear of the nightlife district I was kind of drunk and figured I was close enough to Vermont where it starts to go downhill, so I kept going and managed to mostly glide back to my mechanic’s place behind the Mexican Mafia nightclub at Sunset and Silverlake.

Tagged: laurel canyon kontextmaschine does hollywood blue bitch

Tagged: blue bitch motorcycle honda cb350 cb350