So in talking about the distinctive porn- and social media-mediated post-millennial sexual culture…
“sexual media”. okay I’m gonna use that
So in talking about the distinctive post-millennial sexual media culture, I’ve been talking about how it “reenchants heterosexuality with power gradients” and it’s heavily Fsub, but there’s an exception that on thinking about it really just proves the rule
And it’s the borrowed-from-hentai concept of the “Yandere”, the “crazy eyes”, obsessive, Cluster B, baby-trapping stalker, or knifeplay rapist psycho
And it’s not exactly like that’s a new idea in American culture, Basic Instinct and Fatal Attraction basically limned the type 30 years ago. The conceit of Gone Girl, signal text of our current sociosexual moment, was that Amy Dunne was a yandere the whole time underneath the “Cool Girl” persona she was performing, a lot of noir “femme fatales” were, effectively, yanderes
But in a moment full of all sorts of fetishized Fsub idioms – ageplay and impreg-as-conquest tropes are basically everywhere – it’s like the only* Fdom idiom gaining traction, and that’s striking. Not practice, maybe, a lot of streamer culture is basically mainstream findommeing, but it just shows how much of the sexual consciousness is in a “Make Heterosexuality Predatory Again” space when imagining a woman taking the sexual lead means imagining a woman as a predatory threat.
*okay not really, there’s a much smaller rise in a “tomboy” idiom for assertively but consensually taking a sexual lead. I guess that makes sense, they don’t all grow up to yell discourse in the #butch and #FtM tags, some of them become those Tinder girls with pictures of their CrossFit abs. Still, “the idiom for non-predatory sexual assertion is ‘not really being a girl’‘ is pretty striking in its own right.