{"version": "1.0", "type": "rich", "title": "\u201cI think the most unfortunate clich\u00e9 in our sexual culture is the idea that women want confident men. Confidence, confidence,...", "author_name": "kontextmaschine", "author_url": "https://kontextmaschine.com", "provider_name": "kontextmaschine", "provider_url": "https://kontextmaschine.com", "url": "https://kontextmaschine.com/post/683099913675063296/", "html": "

padeko:

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kontextmaschine:

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st-just:

\u201cI think the most unfortunate clich\u00e9 in our sexual culture is the idea that women want confident men. Confidence, confidence, confidence, it\u2019s drilled into you endlessly as a young man. The trouble is that most dudes don\u2019t know how to perform confidence, and if you go to any meat market bar on a weekend night you\u2019ll see guys literally puff out their chests as they go to approach a woman and then go down in flames.\u201d

\u2014 Freddie deBoer

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Ton of insight into this since the personality change, confidence as outwardly performed before didn\u2019t seem to really do it but (to remind, when a case of COVID proceeded into my nervous system and brain, totally wiping out my anxiety) the change yielded total internal confidence \u2013 doubts are not raised, or are acknowledged, addressed, and dissipate \u2013 and acting on the basis of that is a huge panty-dropper.

The one precedent that comes to mind was this college friend who was schizophrenic and was amazingly charismatic, could lead people anywhere, even on the basis of things that if anyone else said would be immediately recognizable as literally insane, because he had just absolute untroubled confidence in himself

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It\u2019s a difficult concept to internalise, and even harder to fake.

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But as a tip to anyone who is autistic left-brained enough, I improved external performance at least like 3 levels from watching Veronica Mars, no joke

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