{"version": "1.0", "type": "rich", "title": "To follow up on anon I keep deleting and responding to, I think the reason Vienna Teng's face looks so autistic to me is the...", "author_name": "kontextmaschine", "author_url": "https://kontextmaschine.com", "provider_name": "kontextmaschine", "provider_url": "https://kontextmaschine.com", "url": "https://kontextmaschine.com/post/673420988927639552/", "html": "<p><a class=\"tumblr_blog\" href=\"https://somni-omni.tumblr.com/post/673420770921381888/for-a-time-during-my-childhood-i-decided-people\" target=\"_blank\">somni-omni</a>:</p><blockquote><p><a class=\"tumblr_blog\" href=\"/post/673417793597734912/\" target=\"_blank\">kontextmaschine</a>:</p><blockquote><p>To follow up on anon I keep deleting and responding to, I think the reason Vienna Teng&rsquo;s face looks so autistic to me is the musculature has clearly been held at low tonus and impassive this whole time, and not worn into any <i>characteristic</i> form</p></blockquote><p>For a time during my childhood, I decided people were outright not entitled to my emotions (yes I figured out emotional labor as a kid someone give an honorary PhD) and would put effort in not emoting, which led to muscle atrophy in parts of my face. So now when I emote to me it feels like I\u2019m moving face parts but to other people it\u2019s not really noticeable - like I\u2019ll raise my eyebrows in surprise and my eyebrows barely move with some extra give for the one where as a kid I practiced a one eyebrow lift with (like this emoji:  \ud83e\udd28). It throws people off to say the least.</p><p>The other thing is that I do smile a lot so my mouth defaults to that, even when I\u2019m very much not smiling. I\u2019ve grimaced at something bad and people yelled at me for smiling.</p></blockquote>\n<p>Yeah I can kinda grok all the insight I got out of this whole last personality change it&rsquo;s how much I got out of <i>the partial paralysis of my cheek muscles</i> that fucks with me</p>"}