dagny-hashtaggart:

Honestly pretty dissatisfied with both “bi people dating people of the opposite gender are basically straight” and “bi people’s attraction to people of the opposite gender is nothing like straight people’s.” I mean if I have to choose one I guess I’ll pick the latter, given that in some of the circles I move in “basically straight” means “basically an acceptable target,” but I don’t think either statement is actually true.

It’s pretty clear to me that there are ways in which my attraction to women is similar to a straight guy’s, and ways in which it definitely isn’t. The evidence I’ve seen as far as other people (which I’ll grant isn’t exhaustive) suggests this generalizes pretty well across bisexual populations, though it of course also varies from person to person (something the original discourse doesn’t really account for).

As like, the person reading this who has been both straight and bisexual my takeaway sense is that sexual orientation is a question of whose sexual pleasure you resonate with and opposite-sex attraction is distinct as bisexual vs. straight because you’re also resonating with the senses they’re evoking within yourself