kontextmaschine:

Someone I know had a mental break that presented as being intense about politics for the first few days, and again kinda impressed I held it together for mine

Like the “make yourself sleep even if you’re full of energy and ideas, else you’ll be full of energy about the kind of ideas you have after 90 hours awake” AND the “if you’re absolutely convinced of something that sounds like something a crazy person would think when you say it out loud, and everyone you know who you normally trust thinks it’s crazy, then no matter how compelling it feels, assume you’re being crazy” rules, I have those for a reason

Okay now that you’ve had time to digest that and I look wise and in control of my crazy, judgement call:

A few days ago, after all the symptoms of my recent crazy seem to have dissipated, I started getting the sense I could selectively alter the intensity, and thus range, of my senses, from 5ft to 60ft or so.

This was all the senses in unison, including the weird ones like reading air currents and electromagnetic fields with your arm hair. It doesn’t improve my vision as in make it sharper, I just draw more information from what I see

It first presented as a white wireframe-like sphere around me that expanded and contracted a few times with the senses following accordingly, then I could do it freely.

Yes, exactly like a vidya tutorial, I even noticed at the time the sphere reminded me of Parasite Eve targeting

So, question is: crazy in a way that might reflect something real? Or just crazy?

Points in favor of reflecting something real

• I can volitionally alter my heart rate and blood pressure in a way that external observers would agree is real, maybe I can control this
• Like premoderns would expect an angel or diety to deliver them new abilities, I would expect them to just manifest with a tutorial
• The last real crazy period I was seeing in HD and hearing cats stalk through grass a block away, and things like the bisexuality and the disinhibition seem to have stayed in manageable form, why not that?
• “weirdos who lonely contemplate themselves long enough develop superpowers” is a pretty pan-cultural thing

In favor of just crazy

• You’re a good enough storyteller you can stitch together bullshit as an authentic story of your life, and every account of your life as coherent should be discounted like 50% and then another 50% for like how under your pose of humility you’re clearly starting to depict yourself as some sort of demigod
• Super powers, what the fuck? Any “increase in information” is probably you interpolating bullshit noise from your brain and considering it meaningful
• Vidya tutorials, what the FUCK, no