New anon here but maybe you should consider the possibility that you're a girl? I mean, I know you put some effort in it before and probably thought about it back when you were a dumb female-identified teenager, sure. But now you're a grown-ass adult and maybe the topic deserves some more serious thought?
I gave it serious thought. The egg hatched and it’s a cock.
Like part of this \u2013 as someone noted, I actually have a weird core of second-wave feminism
(I think this is from being a very perceptive kid and internalizing the mid-80s. My mom bought me a My Little Pony and Cabbage Patch Kid to not, like, gender my toys [I was more Hot Wheels/GI Joe/Legos tho]. Cabbage Patch Kids are mostly remembered as a Tickle Me Elmo-style fad toy but Xavier Roberts’ whole “adoption” theme was really about priming them as an object of love.
There was a whole-ass Stephen Universe “caring” vibe to childhood then, from Free to Be\u2026 You and Me to the well-advertised My Buddy and Kid Sister dolls, which in retrospect were existentially horrifying sibling substitutes for large-white-ethnic-family boomer yuppies to buy for their only children.)
And I don’t particularly gender my wanting to be dominated, penetrated, and appreciated for my cute vulnerability as female
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