me: guys please do not send confessionals in my anon asking for me to solve you, I am not a mental health professional, it feels really weird, and it is my anon

also me: you deliver prophecy and interpret canon to derive moral lessons, you have repeatedly compared yourself to a cult leader with the ability to change people’s personalities, you just the other day talked about how you conducted a funeral off the top of your head as a child

also me: are you REALLY surprised people come to you as a pastor?