because important historical figures were often used in moralizing tales in medieval times, we have a lot of weird, weird stories about ancient figures. vergil in particular was very popular for weird fanfic purposes, because he was one of their favorite pagans, having “predicted” the birth of christ in his 4th eclogue. medieval vergil is depicted as a magician with a remarkable skill for inventing bizarre things and getting involved in some wacky adventures. some of my favorite stories:
vergil being humiliated by his love interest by getting stuck in a basket that was supposed to lift him up to her bedroom, and as revenge he makes all the fires in rome go out, and the only way to relight them is from the girl’s vagina
vergil learning all of his magic from some demons he let out of a bottle
vergil beheading nero with the help of his best friend hippocrates, and jesus
vergil putting up a gigantic floating statue that makes women stop being horny when they look at it, and his wife trying to get rid of the statue because it’s pissing all of the women off
vergil breaking ovid’s legs for no reason, leading to augustus discovering ovid’s attempt at an affair with his wife an exiling him
an incredibly bizarre variation on the vergil in the basket story that involves pompey being alive at the same time as some king gregory, and also it spends half of the time talking about how sexy vergil is (i’m not joking)
you can find some of these online if you look around (comparetti’s vergil in the middle ages is online for free, i believe) and summaries of my favorites are in my vergil tag, so feel free to check out some truly bizarre vergil fanfic
sometimes i feel a little silly about running my blog but this really puts the quality of my content in perspective
