{"version": "1.0", "type": "rich", "title": "Every Argument About \u201cBuffy\u201d On The Internet, From 1998 Until Now", "author_name": "kontextmaschine", "author_url": "https://kontextmaschine.com", "provider_name": "kontextmaschine", "provider_url": "https://kontextmaschine.com", "url": "https://kontextmaschine.com/post/162233723048/", "html": "<p><a href=\"http://spikesjojo.tumblr.com/post/161090438703/every-argument-about-buffy-on-the-internet-from\" class=\"tumblr_blog\" target=\"_blank\">spikesjojo</a>:</p>\n\n<blockquote><b>Joss Whedon: Inventer Of Feminism Or Literal Hitler?</b><ul><li>Joss\n Whedon invented feminism. Before Joss Whedon, every female character on\n television was crushed to death under the weight of her male co-stars\u2019 \nheavier paychecks in the second-season finale.</li> <li>Every female \ncharacter Joss Whedon ever wrote was forcibly impregnated by a demon and\n brutally murdered, because Joss Whedon hates lesbians.</li> <li>But Warren And The Trio Were \u2013</li> <li>EVERYONE\n GETS THAT WARREN AND THE TRIO REPRESENTED THE THREAT OF \nNON-SUPERNATURAL MISOGYNY, YOU DON\u2019T GET CREDIT FOR PICKING UP ON THAT</li> </ul><p><b>Joss Whedon Doesn\u2019t Understand What Bisexuality Is </b></p><ul><li>Willow Identifies As Gay And You Are Robbing Her Of Self-Determination Because She Doesn\u2019t Have A \u201cGold Star\u201d</li> <li>I\u2019d\n Feel More Comfortable With Willow\u2019s Lesbianism If It Weren\u2019t Sometimes \nEquated With Drug Addiction, Literal Vampirism, And Megalomania</li> <li>But She Was Clearly In Love With Oz</li> <li>Who Are You To Say What Love Is</li> <li>Dark Willow Was Pretty Hot, Though</li> <li>Yeah, Dark Willow Was Super Hot</li> <li>I\u2019d Watch Dark Willow And Doppelgangland-Era Willow Hook Up If It Weren\u2019t A Patriarchal Fantasy</li> </ul><p><b>Spuffy Is Problematic</b></p><ul><li>Bangel Is A Child\u2019s Delusion Of What Love Is</li> <li>Spuffy Is Literally Assault</li> <li>Okay But He Felt Really Bad About It And Didn\u2019t Have A Soul</li> </ul><p><b>Waif-Fu And Thermodynamics: You Can\u2019t Violate The Law Of Conservation Of Momentum </b></p><p><b>Season Six Felt Like Watching My Friends Get Murdered In Slow Motion Right In Front Of Me</b></p><ul><li>It Was Worth It For <i>Once More, With Feeling</i>, Though</li> <li>No, It Wasn\u2019t</li> <li>Doublemeat Palace Cancels Out Once More, With Feeling</li> <li>Doublemeat Palace Cancels Out My Childhood</li> </ul><p><b>Xander Is The Only Character Who Retains Their Humanity On The Entire Show</b></p><ul><li>Xander Is A Greater Monster Than Angelus And Invented \u201cNice Guy\u201d Syndrome</li> </ul><p><b>Buffy Started To Falter After Angel Premiered</b></p><ul><li>No, Buffy Started To Falter After Firefly Premiered</li> <li>No, Buffy Has Never Faltered And Is Still On The Air</li> <li>Buffy Started To Falter When Angel/Faith/Buffy Came Back</li> <li>Buffy Was Better When It Was A Movie With Kristy Swanson</li> </ul><p><b>What If Evil?</b></p><ul><li>Dark Willow Straight-Up Flayed a Dude!</li> <li>Extremism In the Pursuit of Love Is No Vice</li> <li>If a Dude Had Flayed Willow, Would We Be Cheering?</li> </ul><p><b>Everyone Was Too Hard On Dawn For Being A Regular Human Being</b></p><ul><li>Don\u2019t You Dare Try To Retroactively Justify Dawn</li> </ul><p><b>Oz vs. Tara</b></p><ul><li>Oz Was Boring; Tara Was Too Good For This Sinful Earth</li> <li>Tara Was Boring; Oz Was The Greatest Love Interest In Television History; Remember That Animal Crackers Monologue</li> <li>What About Kenned\u2013</li> <li>SHUT UP ABOUT KENNEDY</li> </ul><p><b>Jenny Calendar And Race-Bending </b></p><p><b>Is It Important That Buffy Is Decidedly Not Book Smart?</b></p><ul><li>Not Everyone Is Book Smart, That Is Elitist</li> <li>Buffy is the Lady Channing Tatum of being Body Smart and That Is Sufficient</li> <li>It Is a Tremendous Problem and Girls Should Not Watch This Show Or They Will Not Take College Seriously</li> </ul><p><b>I Shouldn\u2019t Have To Watch Angel In Order To Appreciate Cordelia\u2019s Growth As A Character</b></p><p><b>Shaming: Everyone Is Shamed</b></p><ul><li>\u201cBeer Bad\u201d Is Slut-Shaming</li> <li>\u201cBeer Bad\u201d Is Substance-Shaming and Preachy</li> <li>\u201cBeer Bad\u201d Is Just a Terrible Episode</li> <li>Angel Losing His Soul After He Has Sex With Buffy is Slut-Shaming</li> <li>THE EPISODE WHERE WILLOW ATTENDS THE WICCAN MEETING IS WICCAN-SHAMING WICCANS ARE REAL WE ARE NOT YOUR PUNCHLINE</li> </ul><p><b>KENDRA\u2019S ACCENT THOUGH </b></p><ul><li>Was It Irish Sometimes, Or Was That Just Me?</li> <li>Her Accent is Perfect, and Not To Be Questioned</li> </ul><p><b>Activating All Potential Slayers Was An Act Of Patriarchal Violence</b></p><ul><li>Slaying Is Empowering</li> <li>No, Slayers Were Literally Created When A Woman Of Color Was Forcibly Invaded By A Demonic Essence</li> <li>Oh, Right</li> <li>But Then They Get To Beat Up Everybody</li> <li>Dark Willow Straight-Up Flayed a Dude</li> </ul></blockquote>"}