{"version": "1.0", "type": "rich", "title": "\u201cHey kontextmaschine, what\u2019s today\u2019s Portland adventure?\u201d Riding the bus out to the goddamned industrial district to pick up my...", "author_name": "kontextmaschine", "author_url": "https://kontextmaschine.com", "provider_name": "kontextmaschine", "provider_url": "https://kontextmaschine.com", "url": "https://kontextmaschine.com/post/152436372153/", "html": "<p>\u201cHey kontextmaschine, what\u2019s <i>today\u2019s</i> Portland adventure?\u201d</p><p>Riding the bus out to the goddamned industrial district to pick up my stolen bicycle from the police evidence room!</p><p>See I kept the serial number written down and that actually worked. Filed a report, and then a few months later a cop looking for a pretext to take in some bum ran his ride\u2019s number and there it was.</p><p>Lost it in the first place because I biked back from a bar, left it outside my house intending to open the garage door and then totally blanked on it. Fair enough.</p><p>Now that I think of it I\u2019ve had my last four bikes stolen, at least this one came back. Two bikes ago I <a href=\"http://www.lapdonline.org/newsroom/news_view/43872\" target=\"_blank\">think the guys</a> got <a href=\"http://ca.findacase.com/research/wfrmDocViewer.aspx/xq/fac.20110725_0003634.CCA.htm/qx\" target=\"_blank\">sent to federal</a> by the fucking Secret Service though, that\u2019s a trip.<br/></p>"}