{"version": "1.0", "type": "rich", "title": "probably because that post was too good for this world\n basically it explained how, back in 2012 when Universal Studios made an...", "author_name": "kontextmaschine", "author_url": "https://kontextmaschine.com", "provider_name": "kontextmaschine", "provider_url": "https://kontextmaschine.com", "url": "https://kontextmaschine.com/post/145593792008/", "html": "<p><a class=\"tumblr_blog\" href=\"http://yung-rage.tumblr.com/post/116282487447\" target=\"_blank\">yung-rage</a>:</p>\n<blockquote>\n<p><figure data-orig-width=\"539\" data-orig-height=\"90\" class=\"tmblr-full\"><img src=\"/media/tumblr_inline_nmqhc5MyHg1r72k8c_540_89956cbb9780.png\" alt=\"image\" data-orig-width=\"539\" data-orig-height=\"90\"/></figure></p>\n<p>probably because that post was too good for this world</p>\n<p>basically it explained how, back in 2012 when Universal Studios made an animated film rendition of The Lorax, tumblr found this gangly green noodle attractive:</p>\n<figure data-orig-width=\"409\" data-orig-height=\"337\" class=\"tmblr-full\"><img src=\"/media/tumblr_inline_nmqj3fEoYz1r72k8c_540_46f2e3972647.png\" alt=\"image\" data-orig-width=\"409\" data-orig-height=\"337\"/></figure><figure data-orig-width=\"480\" data-orig-height=\"270\" class=\"tmblr-full\"><img src=\"/media/tumblr_inline_nmqhfozqdb1r72k8c_540_bd14ccd88241.jpg\" alt=\"image\" data-orig-width=\"480\" data-orig-height=\"270\"/></figure><p>and developed a unilateral obsession with him overnight, spilling into deviantart and youtube in a tidal wave of art, fanfiction, cosplay, etc.</p>\n<p>However, Universal made the mistake of providing n o t h i n g for these fans to ship him with. There was nobody attractive enough, relevant enough, in-his-timeline enough, or not-related-to-him enough to have a stable ship. This was the spark of the spiral for the fans looking for romantic or adult content. As I told Ni: \u201c\u2013 eventually they reared their heads back, in uniform, like a massive eldritch ouroboros, and began shipping him. With himself.\u201d</p>\n<p>Classic Oncelers, Greedy green-suited Oncelers (Greedlers), robot Oncelers, pimp Oncelers, old Oncelers, young Oncelers, the 1972 book version Onceler, AU Oncelers of every conceivable origin \u2013 everyone was shipped with <i>everything</i>.\u00a0\u201cOncest\u201d was coined. <a href=\"http://oncelersmasterpost.tumblr.com/\" target=\"_blank\"><b>Look. At. This. Shit.</b></a></p>\n<p>There was also some other golden stuff, including but not restricted to <a href=\"https://www.tumblr.com/search/glovecest\" target=\"_blank\">Glovecest</a>,\u00a0Empted:</p>\n<figure data-orig-width=\"448\" data-orig-height=\"319\" class=\"tmblr-full\"><img src=\"/media/tumblr_inline_nmqi32IU5D1r72k8c_540_8ada1a38a49b.png\" alt=\"image\" data-orig-width=\"448\" data-orig-height=\"319\"/></figure><p><i><a href=\"http://empty-os.tumblr.com/\" target=\"_blank\">\u201cThe cereal has an ask blog</a>.\u201d</i></p>\n<p>and my personal favorite by the mere fact of its existence: \u201cMoney on Wheels\u201d \u2013 a pairing that is\u00a0\u201ca personification of money and the onceler\u2019s racecar bed\u201d</p>\n<p>This was a fandom scraping the bottom of the barrel and it is one of the most fascinating internet phenomenon I have ever fucking witnessed. I am obsessed with the fact that it even fucking <i>happened at all </i>because I\u2019ve never seen anything else like it<i>.</i></p>\n<p>And the most interesting thing about it? It\u2019s like it NEVER HAPPENED. The fandom just DROPPED OFF THE FACE OF THE EARTH suddenly and you can\u2019t help but feel like the whole thing was some surreal jarring nightmare.</p>\n<p>\n\n\u201c<b>This has become a community crisis, America is in crisis. There is an Once-ler Fetish that has gone out of control.</b>\u201d -\n\nEd Helms, voice of the Onceler during a Q&amp;A twitter session during the height of the fever. I\u2019m not joking.<br/></p>\n</blockquote>", "thumbnail_url": "https://kontextmaschine.com/media/tumblr_inline_nmqhc5MyHg1r72k8c_540_89956cbb9780.png", "thumbnail_width": 539, "thumbnail_height": 90}