shrine to the prophet of americana

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The Recruit - Willamette Week

The Recruit - Willamette Week

Portland Public Schools in search of more black teachers recruits woman from Atlanta. Black woman from Atlanta completely at sea in Portland culture of SWPL passive-aggression. Money quote:

My doctor decided I needed to go see a counselor. I was having a mini-breakdown from—I’m just going to say it—dealing with so many white adults. So they sent me to therapy for it. In Portland, there’s therapy for that, and apparently the counselor I had had a good caseload. So there are a lot of people going to it.

Tagged: portlandportlandportland amazing

it’s tough being the smartest person on this website, but we’ve all gotta do it.

supersmashthestatebros:

it’s tough being the smartest person on this website, but we’ve all gotta do it.

Vatican City. Detail of Rome city map by PlanosUrbanos https://www.facebook.com/PlanosUrbanosMaps

mapsontheweb:

Vatican City. Detail of Rome city map by PlanosUrbanos https://www.facebook.com/PlanosUrbanosMaps

WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCK???????????

scar-from-the-father:

sombras-return:

jiinsy:

cutthoatclassics:

thahalfrican:

loanlyish:

WHAT IN THE ACTUAL FUCK???????????

bruh.

image

Lmao that’s actually hella sick!

this guy was definitely paying attention in 3rd grade music class

image

OH SHIT!!

Hitler’s involved!

HOLY FUCK

Tagged: humans

Tagged: wisconsin

i'm trying to figure out what "dycishet" means but i'm not coming up with anything

Anonymous asked: i'm trying to figure out what "dycishet" means but i'm not coming up with anything

playinghardtolistento:

cs-inactive1-deactivated2020060:

some people have started to use “dyadic” to describe non-intersex people iirc so I think this “dycishet” is just that filtered through the usual “me too”isms and competitive oppression studies

that is, Language Development has become an end unto itself for many plucky young queers and I think that people attempt to carve out niches by inventing more and more “inclusive” language independent of whether or not doing so fills a need or facilitates understanding, and without considering the ways in which they are rhetorically isolating themselves

liberation taxonomy

Tagged: liberation taxonomy !!!

Someone just uploaded their complete collection of Kmart in-store background music | Chart Attack

Someone just uploaded their complete collection of Kmart in-store background music | Chart Attack

at some point in 2012, groupon produced the “groupon kidz club”, a small series of animated shorts which 1. clearly parodied the...

spacetwinks:

at some point in 2012, groupon produced the “groupon kidz club”, a small series of animated shorts which 1. clearly parodied the old 90s burger king kids club and 2. were real fucking weird

the groupon website’s official page for the groupon kidz club now denies the very existence of the groupon kidz club

image

So if I told you someone was using century-old hand-crafted artisanal methods to adapt traditional folk tales into a quaintly...

So if I told you someone was using century-old hand-crafted artisanal methods to adapt traditional folk tales into a quaintly obsolete art form from the American Golden Age that would sound like the most twee, precious, non-normie thing ever and I just described Disney animation.

Disney’s pretty weird like that. Like, take the parks. They’re combinations of Coney Island and World’s Fairs with this undisguisable midcentury earnestness. These are places that get seriously psyched about the potential of novel transit modalities.

And the theming - “Let’s look forward to the wonderful future of space exploration, celebrate our roots in farm towns and the frontier west, AND enjoy the exotic charm of the South Pacific and Old Dixie!”

THERE IS A PAGEANT WHERE ROBOTS PAY TRIBUTE TO EXECUTIVE-DRIVEN WHIG HISTORY.

Oh. Oh. And. “The rides aren’t very thrilling, but your kids will love the chance to explore the worlds of all their favorite authors - A.A. Milne, J.M. Barrie, Kenneth Grahame, Mark Twain, AND Lewis Carroll - while you’ll marvel at the exquisite background design.”

(Sun-dappled Edwardian neoteny and obsessive set decoration. Wes Anderson makes movies like Walt Disney made parks.)

And we’d recognize this all as a weird thing to exist in 2015 if we weren’t just used to it as the background noise of America. Like, I don’t really watch TV so I don’t see commercials much these days.

Oh man, they’re a trip in their own right if you’ve stopped taking them for granted. Like, “oh hey, for the next 30 seconds some of our best artists are going to use all their techniques and leverage all your emotions and desires and every social value in a masterful, unapologetic, and unforgettable bid for you to give us money, and then everyone will move on and no one will acknowledge this even happened.”

But the Disney World commercials in particular - you notice they don’t really make a case for going to Disney World, or even really explain what Disney World is. Because they’re not pitching Disney World, they’re reminding you of Disney World. It’s not “hey, Disney World is a thing you could go to”, it’s “hey, maybe it’s time for this generation’s pilgrimage”.

Disney’s weird. It’s kind of a company, but also custodian of some of the cultic functions of American culture, something like the priestly colleges of ancient Rome.

Like, they maintain sites of pilgrimage. I’m not saying that as a joke. Back of the envelope calculation, Americans go to Disney parks at a rate 7 times higher than Muslims go to Mecca. (The line between “tourist trap” and “religious site” has always been thin.)

And they’re custodians of the national narrative. Like I’ve said, they pitch “continuity with prewar small town and earlier frontier culture” as a fundamental, almost taken-for-granted aspect of Americanness with a confidence and charm you don’t often see these days. And I mean, hell, the Disney animated canon itself basically is to America what Grimm’s was to Germany.

And as custodians, they curate that narrative - like, we joke about “you know your identity group’s made it in America when you get your own Disney princess”, and laugh at the people reediting Disney character designs to look like their specific subgroup, but that only works because it’s fucking true, your identity group’s made it in America when you get your own Disney princess. I’ve worked with Disney Channel casting, and they mix ethnicities with the same care, precision, and scale that Pfizer mixes drugs.

And that robot pageant, the Hall of Presidents? Look at this history. It started out in the ‘70s as a celebration of consensus history and popular triumph, with character actors playing great men and Civil War tensions understood as a challenge to national unity. In 1993 it was reworked by Eric Foner to be narrated by Maya Angelou, use “regular people” unknowns to portray more vulnerable takes on historic figures and re-frame the Civil War in terms of slavery as a moral challenge. In 2009 they redid it again, mostly keeping the changes but bringing back some of the old Hollywood charm and putting Morgan Freeman as the voice of civic authority.

And like, as a representation of how America understands itself and its history, correct. That is absolutely, in every way, 100% correct.

(In the other direction, Walt Disney originally wanted to call it “One Nation Under God”, which yikes)

They say American copyright terms keep getting extended under pressure from Disney who wants to keep hold of all their founding properties, I almost wonder if it wouldn’t be less of a corruption of the civic system to just carve out special protections for Disney in recognition of their distinct role in America.

But… at the end of the day, it’s all just a strategy to maximize profits.

I used to be a lot more libertarian than I am now, and one of their tribal boogiemen, the idea of a “Ministry of Culture” - a government that sees the national culture as its domain, to shape as it will, “as it will” meaning as it always does with governments “through the instrument of bureaucracy” - that still rankles.

But what’s the alternative, though? You think about it and you realize it’s this - the national mythos rests in the hands of a publicly traded corporation.

(And then you maybe start to appreciate WHY having your king as the head of your church once made sense as a symbol of liberty and self-determination.)

((And start to recall the CIA going around giving grants to the avant-garde with a certain fondness.))

We live in the capitalpunk AU.

Tagged: disney amhist capitalpunk kontextmaschine classic disneyland +1 more

Guangxi karst hills

elvenlake:

Guangxi karst hills

interviewer: you've put a gun in all of your episodes that is labeled, quite literally, "chekhov's gun", which belongs to a...

interviewer: you've put a gun in all of your episodes that is labeled, quite literally, "chekhov's gun", which belongs to a character in your show named chekhov
me: yeah
interviewer: and you include a zoom-in on the gun every episode to make sure the audience can see it
me: i do
interviewer: why is that
me: i like reading really angry and wildly theoretical thinkpieces

Tagged: the disc

📈#trending

deathgripsforcutie:

slimetony:

fearboss:

mattfurie:

📈#trending

https://twitter.com/realDonaldTrump/status/653856168402681856 holy fuck

oh  my god

oh my fucking gdo

We’re living in a parody of the real universe I’ve had enough I want out please

jesus christ watch the video thats attached

Tagged: donald trump

Emergency Broadcast Network came out with this in 1993, over 10 years before Youtube was founded. They’re the forebearers of...

sourcefieldmix:

ipissedinyourmountaindew:

mikerugnetta:

kenyatta:

tripropellant:

crungus:

flslayer:

ebilflindas:

tapehook:

Emergency Broadcast Network came out with this in 1993, over 10 years before Youtube was founded. They’re the forebearers of Youtube poop. Still holds up too.

this was made 22 YEARS AGO.

holy shit

oldtube poop

this has the structure and most of the standard joke formats of a modern 2015 youtube poop i’m completely blown away

I consider EBN one of the great influences in my life and have been fortunate to know a couple of it’s members Joshua (a tiny bit) and Greg (a lot.) Joshua is a brilliant video editor and Greg frikkin wrote frikkin After Effects (the greatest post production software of all time, imo.)

Really good YouTube Poop is hard to make. Making videos like EBN did in the early to mid-90′s was nearly impossible. This is because the tools for transforming video digitally were primitive, the machines costly (an Avid or Media 100 NLE cost upwards of $50,000 to build and thousands more to maintain) and hard to access (the only people who owned them were broadcasters, post production studios, and the like.) The source media itself had shitloads of copyright on it which has no practical meaning now but meant quite a bit way back when.

The 1990s were an age of tightly controlled analog mass media outlets and in it, EBN’s work was subversive for both its politics and its disregard of intellectual property rights. EBN wasn’t commercially viable (the legal sampling war had just begun) and it wasn’t pop (even though it was danceable in that 90′s techno rave sort of way) which meant that their work never traveled far beyond its most immediate social networks of media, art, and technology. EBN was signed to the indie TVT Records imprint but they considered themselves, primarily, live-remix performance artists who occasionally “recorded” albums (TVT distributed licensed versions of EBN’s work on CDs, VHS tapes, and 3.5″ floppies.) This combination of factors made it nearly impossible to experience the bulk of their work.

That isn’t to say that they weren’t extremely influential. If you ever saw or heard about the remixed visuals of U2′s groundbreaking ZOOTV tour, then you’ve seen the work of EBN. The group was also commissioned by MTV to make a half hour special about their work with U2 (back when it seemed like everyone watched MTV) and they even made a bunch of visual idents for the network. This exposed millions of people to the EBN remix aesthetic, rhythm, and structure even if they didn’t know where it came from. (Of course, that aesthetic had it’s own immediate roots in the work of The Bomb Squad and Public Enemy but that is a post for another day.)

So while it’s unfortunate that more YTP creators aren’t conscious of their Emergency Broadcast Network ancestry, considering the time and circumstance under which EBN existed, it’s totally understandable and it’s great that people have even discovered it at all.

Watch (and listen) to their work here. We Will Rock You, Psychoactive Drugs, and Get Down are some of my favs.

This is all amazing but of great personal importance: I loved Zoo TV–The Television Program and whenever I bring it up no one ever knows what I’m talking about. To the point where I was starting to get convinced I made it up / hallucinated it. I had no idea it was an EBN project! This is very exciting and validating for me.

What the fuck one of the guys from EBN made after effects???

boobtube poop

Tagged: taylor swift

Health Goth is an aesthetic revolving around biotechnology, monochrome sportswear, fetish culture, extreme cleanliness, and...

nostalgebraist:

Health Goth is an aesthetic revolving around biotechnology, monochrome sportswear, fetish culture, extreme cleanliness, and rendered environments.

I didn’t know that “health goth” was actually a “thing” as opposed to an absurdist tumblr joke and so far the Wikipedia page is only increasing my confusion

Health Goth started out as some Portlanders making a joke; unfortunately Portland is the capital of both the outdoor/sportswear industry and aestheticblogging and it went too far.

Tagged: portlandportlandportland

New Architectural Collages That Double as Visual Poems by Matthias Jung

itscolossal:

New Architectural Collages That Double as Visual Poems by Matthias Jung