givemeinternet:

SEA IS FOR COOKIE!

monetizeyourcat:

goats and sheeps are probably equally intelligent goats are just curious and sort of assholes so we associate their intelligence more with our own as we are also curious and sort of assholes

ghostbongweedofthesamurai:

7/14/2014 Toady One Slightly changed the way dwarves enter into romantic relationships.  Individual dwarfs are now assigned a desirability rating determined by the total point value of all skill levels learned, value of items in possession, and quality of desirable physical traits (which are different for each civilization and determined at world creation.)  Matching was supposed to work by assigning dwarfs to partners with similar ratings, but due to a small oversight they were continuously entering into relationships until the combined rating of all partners equaled their own.  This created problems when the king arrived and quickly appropriated a large amount of wealth, dramatically increasing his desirability rating and causing all the female dwarves to leave their partners for him.  The resulting negative thoughts created by the loss of partners plus the inability to find new ones lead to a number of violent rampages, eventually causing the collapse of the fortress.

fiendswithbenefits:

zchr:

i just set it up and it seems to be working

if you’re at the club and someone asks for your number just give them this

Had some hella intense dreams last night. Most of it I doubt would be very interesting to anyone else, the one exception being the image of a phalanx of cops in full riot armor and Guy Fawkes masks.

“To Protect and Serve, Not Forgive or Forget”

3liza:

breevandetramp:

this is my favorite thing on the internet

this is one of those things where if its true its fantastic, and if it isnt true its fantastic that someone took to the time to conceive of and then write it

everyone I’ve known to encounter Paris Hilton the person (as vs. the character) said she’s not ~educated~ but pretty sharp and knew exactly what she was doing

For a decade I’ve been using Slashdot as lorem ipsum to test whether my internet connection is on, for the first time I can remember I actually looked at it a second ago.

None of the articles would in any way seem out of place from when I last paid attention, eyebrowed that two of the ads (Marylhurst University/Oscar Meyer Selects) are marketing “Product (college/hot dog) for Grown-Ups”

You know what nostalgia property would make for a decent gritty-realist reboot? Captain Planet.

bloodandhedonism:

kontextmaschine:

You know what nostalgia property would make for a decent gritty-realist reboot? Captain Planet.

Get back to LA, mister. This will be your big break.

Atlanta. Captain Planet was Ted Turner’s vanity project.

In other “huh really” nostalgia ownership chronicles, Rainbow Brite & Strawberry Shortcake were Hallmark properties.

(And these, plus the DuckTales/Darkwing Duck/TaleSpin Disney stuff, plus the Tiny Toons/Animaniacs/Batman WB stuff, all came together around the same time because Reagan’s FCC gave up on protecting kids from commercials.)

old-ass-mall-photos:

river roads mall, jennings (a suburb of st louis), missouri, 1988

maybe u have noticed that old-ass-mall-photos has been having approximately one hot old mall photo per year starting with 1979 well now we are at 1988 and tbh we are going to stay at 1988 for a while b/c 1988 was one of the true years it was one of the years that was real and true and we are gonna have a lot of hot old malls to look at in 1988 especially ones which were already dated in 1988 like this cool 1960s-style woolworth’s which river roads mall attempt to freshen up using then-current river roads mall branding on the flags and on the trash cans especially check out the branding on the trash can which looks delightfully close to a pbs logo and i’m not even going to start in on how good food counters in department stores like the one visible here are they are so incredible and tbh probably merit their own side blog especially 1970s department store lunch counters

tombomp:

it’s incredible how near every supporter of a no vote is unbelievably patronising, insulting and really shitty about Scottish people

Went out to the pub with the Scotsman to watch the MLS/Bayern Munich game yesterday, he was all enthusiastic about the referendum. Was a little ticked that the vote wasn’t limited/extended to Scots anywhere, and instead would be among whoever just happened to be living in Scotland, though.

I think it’s a bad idea, I just don’t see where the money’s going to come from. Industry’s for shit still, no City to siphon from directly or lean on for bond issues, and meanwhile you’ve got a population that wants social democracy as if not only Thatcher but Heath never happened. I guess you could compete with Ireland as the English-speaking European nation that can bend over furthest for multinationals, but you’d probably have to scrap and rebuild a lot of Scots law as a lure and that’d sure run against the social democracy/national pride thing.

He thinks it’ll run off North Sea oil, as if that’s forever, as if they’d just inherit it as a matter of principle and proximity nevermind they don’t have any diplomatic chits to trade in to get claims recognized or any navy to keep them enforced. A+ plan there, mate.

BEST case scenario they play Ireland, Norway, and Sweden off each other bidding for Scottish allegiance and access while extracting a begrudging tolerance from the rump UK in return for not stirring up shit in Wales and Norn Iron, take an immediate quality of life hit back towards the ‘80s at least but keep things patched over with national pride while building up labor-intensive specialty and organic agriculture then start moving up the value chain towards exportable expertise and equipment in that sector, maybe some cultural/landscape tourism on the side, stumble their way towards some kind of northern New Zealand.

Worst case scenario they find themselves frozen out in the region and start to fall into Russia’s orbit by process of elimination, NATO pushes destabilization campaigns and reincorporation starts serving as an imperial palingetic-flavored paste to hold together coalitions south of the border.

Middle course, I see most likely, they start off full of starry-eyed wonder, in international booms it looks like the sky’s the limit, in downturns everything always looks about to fall apart but never quite does, they keep grabbing after the big thing that’s going to make it all finally work - green energy, shipping in the newly ice-free Northern seas, some bullshit that can’t even be predicted yet - until the camel’s back is finally broken and they come crawling back hat in hand in a few decades.

How’s that?

bloodandhedonism:

Cards Against Humanity is pretty much the Trivial Pursuit of the new generation regarding the phenomenon of gaming-based socializing.

A week or so ago A. O. Scott made the point that CAH would take the place of bridge in a modern version of the chart from Russel Lynes’ “Highbrow, Lowbrow, Middlebrow”.

Saw Guardians of the Galaxy today. Eeeeh, I dunno. Very impressive visually - every long shot had plenty of stuff going on at once including establishing shots that looked like old fashioned matte backgrounds but fully animated in 3D. Closer shots had all sorts of nifty action effects though nothing that really sticks with you, all of it in vibrant colors. Fun throwaway worldbuilding-by-implication.

That said a lot of the buzz was like “it’s a superhero movie with all that entails, but it makes up for it in decent writing and self-awareness” and that’s not remotely true. Plotting, characterization, thematics, dialogue, are all written as if by an 8th grade lunch table, for an 8th grade lunch table. Two hours later and I can remember maybe one line to quote, and that might be more from a gifset.

No subtext at all to character interaction, what of a “romantic” subplot there is consists of literally throwing characters into physical contact, for the benefit of an audience that knows it’s supposed to want to rub up against other people but isn’t quite sure why yet. The actors’ delivery of those ridiculous lines is balanced between playing it straight for effect and hamming it up, delivering the charm of neither. Early ‘80s aesthetics invoked for lolrandom quirk value. (People with actual early '80s nostalgia are now in their 40s at least.)

A lot of the worst exposition seems done as a down payment towards the sequels - both the direct one and whatever Marvel pic has to carry the next bit of the Infinity Gems super-arc. Interesting premise, interesting setting, but it would be nice to see it all given more room to breathe. Though I suppose if my takeaway was “I would like a chance to explore this brand in greater depth” the Marvel branch of the Walt Disney Industrial Mass Culture Concern isn’t going to feel too sad.

“An inferior Fifth Element”, meant as lukewarm praise.

The New Republic in one screenshot.